Next Order of Business. Guns.

Yeah, yeah. I know, Rambo. You would have made this the first order of business, but truth is, most people think about running first. Then they finally get tired of running and realize they’re gonna have to stand and fight at some point.

With that in mind, I will always hold to the wisdom that the best gun for the job is the one you have in your hand. That’s going to be your only choice if you start looking for a weapon after the zombie apocalypse hits.

Then my advice to you is to try to find something you’re familiar with and can handle. No exotic caliber guns. Go for something like a 9 mil or even a .22. You have to be able to find bullets. The ammo fairy isn’t going to just magically replenish your supply.

But if you come across a .357 guns and it’s loaded? Pick that bad boy up and conserve those bullets like the gold they are until you either find more or locate a replacement piece. Any gun is better than no gun at all. Period.

This “best guns” discussion can and does go on for fricking ever, but here’s my ideal zombie weapons cache in a nutshell.

Ruger 10/22

For a primary long gun when I have time and I want to stay quiet, I’d go with a suppressed Ruger 10/22 outfitted with the BX-25 x 2 for a total 50 rounds.

That’ll take care of human threats and zombies. It’s a super reliable weapon in all conditions and has pretty much been the .22 of choice for half a century.

Pump 12 Gauge

Now, for close quarter dirty work, there’s nothing to replace a pump action 12 gauge. If you’re dealing with bad people, just the sound of a shell getting racked into a riot gun is enough to make most folks stop and think. Since zombies don’t think, just start blasting.

Good thing about your standard pump 12 gauge is they almost never jam and they’ll clear a room like a hot knife through butter, especially if loaded with double 00 buck.

If you’ve never fired a shotgun, the kick will surprise the hell out you. Best case scenario, you’ll spend some time on a tactical range and get a feel for the weapon.

If not, plant your feet and brace yourself, but don’t go completely rigid. Anticipate the recoil and take it into your body.

AK-47 Variant

For engagements out in the open when stealth doesn’t matter or is not an option, an AK-47 variant is your best choice.

Why? Ammo is plentiful. The AK is so damned user friendly, kids in Afghanistan break them down and put them back together without missing a beat.

And this is one gun that will keep firing when it’s absolutely filthy. It’s so reliable you can even lubricate it with motor oil in a pinch.

Glock 17 9mm

For my sidearm, I have to go with the 9mm Glock 17. Remember that trashed Wal-Mart scenario? The shelves will be piled with 9mm ammo. Ditto for the country store with the sign that reads, “Beer, Bait, Ammo, and Prom Dresses.”

This is roughly a $500 automatic. If you’ve never fired a gun in your life, get to a range, get an instructor, and go every day until you can hit what you aim at.